Busy Bee

I've been at this internship for a month and I hardly have time for anything else. I love it a lot. don't get me wrong. In fact it has really helped me get my priorities straight. As much as I would love to sleep in on the weekends, I don't because I have to get everything done that I can't get done during the week! I enjoy sleep so much more and have a fantastic sleep schedule. Really, hasn't been this good since elementary school. I am going to everything I am invited too (on the weekends) and spending time with people I really care about. What I have found is that this blog isn't one of those things that I can really spend time on. I am not deleting it because I am sure I will come back to it in a time of crisis but for now... I want to apologize for the lack of posts but I'm not changing that for a while!

Arrrrgh!

I began my internship yesterday and it was probably the best day to start. It happened to also be the annual staff outing. So at 3pm, the entire theatre rushed outside onto the pier and we climbed aboard a pirate ship and took a 2 hour sail around Lake Michigan. And if that wasn't enough, they proceeded to then feed me delicious appetizers! WHAT? Awesome. Today, while not spent on the water, is also going to be pretty cool. It is the first rehearsal of one of our fall shows and we have designer presentations and meeting the cast and breakfast. I am liking the pattern of work feeding me. So far I believe my job entails just a lot of organizing so that seems perfect for me. Some of you might have just cocked your head to the side and said, "but Ashley, you live like a pig... your room is a mess... do you even know how to file?... do you even own a planner?... do you know what a spice rack looks like?" The answer my friends is, I cannot organize my own life so, I enjoy organizing other people's lives. I believe the problem is that I am SO organized and SO OCD that I can't find a system that works for me because none of them are neat enough. Hence my life explodes into organized chaos where I know that the stapler is three inches below the construction paper which is right beside my makeup brushes. Other people however get the joyously organized, neat freak that is within. So work is gonna be great... YAY!

One of those days...

It is one of those days where I can't do anything right. More like one of those weeks. There have been some good things such as getting an internship and my sister becoming a Theta but honestly other than that... not much.

It is really lonely here right now. Matthew, who I am staying with, just left for the week so I have an apartment to myself and I don't know what to do with it. Boyfriend and I are no longer Boyfriend and I and I had to go pick some things up from his place yesterday and it was weird. It was awkward and it hurt. Honestly, I never stopped caring for him but we weren't going to last. It was worth it to waste our time. And then on top of that, the program I will be doing so I get credit for my internship requires full tuition and my parents are not thrilled about that. It makes sense to me. I am getting credit at the university so I should pay them for that but my parents believe (and it also makes sense) that I am not utilizing their staff so our money should not go to them.

My parents and I have a weird relationship. We are wonderfully tight and I love them very much but if I ever have a differing opinion from one of them my neck is on the line. It is hard to be my own person. And these aren't huge issues like religion or politics. These are issues like the length of shorts or color of top. Whether or not to dress up for Walmart. I am confused. When am I allowed to have my own opinion? When am I allowed to say what I feel and not be told I am wrong? I owe my life to these people but at the same time isn't it MY life? They fund me. I think that is my biggest incentive right now to just shut up and listen.

I blame the rain and grey skies for this post.

Patriotism

I've been avoiding this blog during my time in Colorado in order to try and enjoy my time here. But something has brought me back and that something is the Olympics. There is nothing more beautiful to me than all of the countries coming together during all of the chaos that is in the world to have some fun. Was I confused by the Opening Ceremonies? OF COURSE! There was a giant baby at one point. But it was beautiful and I cried and I wanted it to last forever. The Olympics is an example to our generation. We have the power to just stop. We can stop all the hate, all the fighting, all the discrimination, and just enjoy this beautiful world we all inhabit. None of us are better than any one else. We are different. We have different customs, religions, styles, views, and that is what makes us beautiful. That is what makes this world miraculous. We have the ability to take billions of humans and build something. Why do we tear it down? Why do we destroy certain cultures? We are scared. It is not enough to be scared. Fear is not knowing. So we must learn. Instead of fighting the people who scare us, we should get to know them. We all have the same biology. We all want to smile and laugh and be loved. So why is it difficult to do this when skin, language, or beliefs are different? The Olympics reminds us that there is a good kind of competition. Not the game of survival but of sport.

CRAFTS!!!

I love CRAFTING! So I recently made this shirt:

See the monogram detailing?! It is so I can look classy in Aspen when I want to be lazy! YAY!

The Stars and Stripes are Big and Bright....

Dallas has been so much better than I thought it could be! Lauren and Erin have been filling my life with wonder and crafts inspire me daily. Today, I took a song by Jonathan Coulton and made a mug out of it using the Sharpie technique on Pinterest. My hint to you, do NOT run the mug under water to cool it down... it will crack... you will have to super glue it back together... BUT I do love this mug!

 

This is how it turned out. except I painted the whole handle black. I am so excited to use it and make some more! Hopefully some without cracks though considering it is more for look than use, the cuteness completely counteracts the coffee that will probably spill on my lap.

Next craft: I'm gonna try another mug and then a LV tank top... you know Lord Voldemort!

She's My Little Whiskey Girl...

...But tequila makes her clothes fall off.

I had a wonderful time last night! For my birthday, Ray got us tickets to the Brad Paisley concert at Wrigley Field. But this was an event! Jarod Niemann opened followed by The Band Perry, Chris Young, Miranda Lambert and then Brad himself. We were so close! We were sitting on the field, with special wristbands and everything. But there was this great moment when Brad started singing "Remind Me" and a glowing silhouette started walking out for the girl part and then Carrie Underwood was there! That wonderful woman flew in to sing half a song at this concert and I was dying! Just dying!

With Wrigley behind us!

So many cool lights with this theme

No zoom on this... that is the stage RIGHT THERE

Somehow this is my life

MIRANDA! 

I helped my mom move my gramma out of her house this week as well. It was the final move because on Saturday there was an estate sale. I of course swept up some wonderful things: a 50's fur coat, my great-grandma's go to formal dress, some silk blouses, a hot pink pencil skirt, and a safari skirt that may or may not ever actually come in style again. I also snagged this sweet jacket for Mrs. Raya (my high school theatre director) since she is doing "Back to the 80's" again this fall.

Sexii & U No It

I head home Wednesday evening, a little earlier than I had previously planned but I have dealt with it. Ray and my one year anniversary is Thursday so we will be celebrating on Tuesday night. It is incredible how quickly time passes when it is with someone you love so much. He has done so much for me that he will never know and I will never be able to properly thank him for. It is really amazing to date your best friend in the world.

My Handsome Cowboy

So this is probably my last post from Chi-town  until September! Big D... here I come!

And It's Outta Here!

As of about 8 minutes ago, I became a senior... woah. I technically turned in my last paper at like 11 this morning BUT I didn't feel like a senior until I completely moved out of Theta. Now as much as I love the Tau and all it has to offer (Carlos & Carlos are incredible cooks!) I am thrilled to be living off campus next year and enjoying not having to deal with inspections and being able to have a mini bar without getting a strike and having my own room. I celebrated by buying myself a super big gulp of Dr Pepper before the Mayor of New York passes on his 16 oz drink idea to everyone and am now sitting, sweating from unpacking my room all by myself, and typing away. I called my dad to tell him proudly and out of breath but HEY! I got in my first workout of the summer by carrying all 16 boxes packed full up and down the stairs. I have blisters and little black floaty things in front of my face but everything is going to be all right. I'm back to Dallas in a week and a half and I'm beginning to get excited for it! Time to get this girl back into the heat and the Park Cities to inspire her to look like the model skinny, size 00 40-year-olds!

New Layout

I decided that I wanted to change up the layout on the page to be a bit more mature. Not so much purple. A more classic feel. Basically, after almost 9 months of blogging it was time to express my other side. You know, my "I sometimes wear pearls with sweatpants" kinda of classy side. In fact, my goal this summer is to make sure that every item I have can be made into a classy outfit or at least a classy studying outfit. I want to be able to pick out any item and dress it up or down and love on everything I'm wearing that day. I also want to slowly build into that "out of college, I wear heels casually" place. There are a lot of places I want to get to this summer, like 20 lbs lighter but that's an entirely different fight... like my fight with the treadmill and the morning. So first stop, change the blog and second stop change the world.. or at least my body! YAY!

June Post... DONE!

At this rate I'm looking at one post a month... that's pretty bad. It is just with school wrapping up and all there isn't much to write about unless y'all want to hear about my papers... BLECH!

So it looks like my summer might be figured out. I'm not sure if I'm happy about it or not but it is something. I might be spending a month house sitting in Aspen and the rest of it in Dallas. Though I just got cast in the Scottish Play and I have to be back at school September 10th for that. Not really like that is a worry because everyone I know will be back at school anyway. Since we don't start until Halloween practically.

Theta formal happened. My sorority involvement is so small. I'm sorry Betty Locke for failing you. Really.

But at least we looked charming for once! We ran straight from Medieval Times for this event. Ray thought he had lost his wallet at Medieval Times. Turns out it was in the shower... weird one Ray.

Dillo happened as well. I took at 5:45 am flight home to spend my morning with these lovely people who I am sure Iw ill call family very soon. This is most of the Dance Marathon Executive board for next year and a few alums as well. I love them so much and can't wait to see what we do together!

And then I spend the afternoon with people like this. Wonderful fabulous humans who make me smile and have been there for me throughout college. Many of whom are graduating in a week and I don't know what to do about it. Many are staying in Chicago but a lot are leaving me for far off lands like New York. Twill be rough.

The year is wrapping up. One more paper to go and then I'm outta here. I guess. Don't really want to leave but that is the plan right now. There will be a silver lining somewhere. I am happy to get to see Lauren and Erin but also sad to leave Ray and people here. Life pulls you in so many directions and you just got to figure out which direction is the right one to turn down right then.

Still Not Summer

I still have two weeks of school left. And I wonder why I can't get a summer job. I believe it is because I am in school so late that they fill up all their positions with people who get out the month before I do. I hate this. I would love a job please. I would love to not be doing school work in June please. ALSO! Next year we start school even later! The first day of classes is Thursday, September 27th. I don't graduate until June 22nd.... WHAT?!?! This means that Lauren and Erin are completely available to visit me... right?! Chicago is pretty in the summer time... I promise!!!!!! I just wish I was done with my papers and projects. But it isn't that I am running behind. Honestly it is because I have so much time left!

Couple Crush

I think it is totally acceptable to have a crush on a couple. And today I am sharing that my couple crush is none other than Travis and Erin. Every time I read a story about something they did together I throw up a little in my mouth from the utter cuteness and thoughtfulness and fun that they have! I adore that after however many years it has been that they still have that adventurous spirit in their relationship and I strive to be like them!

Red, red, wiiiiiiiiiine

Twenty-one brings many beautiful things. It brings the ability to stay in bars past midnight. It allows me to try all the fruity drinks on the menu. But I think my favorite thing it does by far is that it brings my nightly glass of red wine to me. I LOVE red wine. Not in like a crazy drink a bottle a day kind of thing but after rehearsal I really enjoy curling up with some good TV or my computer and sipping a glass of red wine. They say that it is good for my heart and I won't argue. So as I type this, I have been sipping on my glass from the bottle from my Easter basket and feeling uncontrollably sophisticated in the process. Blogging and wine. I'm so COOL!

Thursday Blunders

I didn't have class yesterday. I barely had class Tuesday and Monday my class was taught by this incredible deaf actor so it was more fun than class. So Thursday comes along and I have a project due and two full classes each two hours long followed by four hours of rehearsal and producer petitions for an hour and a project after that so my evening is ending at 11:30 when I get to go home and start all my work watch some TV. It has been a long day. But there have been some fabulous things...

1. Quesadillas. Quesadillas are fantastic and portable and warm. So today when I was running very late after throwing together the last part of my project I was able to toss some of Carlos' (Theta's Chef) Quesadillas on a paper plate and run to acting. They were steak and cheese and pepper with guac and I could not be happier. 
2. Sailor Dress. I bought this dress for $5 from Urban with Lo Haines last Christmas during one of their fantastic sales. It is see-through and short and gaps at my breastises but I always get complimented when I wear it and it always makes me feel so preppy and reminds me of home a bit. 



This is the dress. Though this is not me.


3. Text Messages. Ray sent me a text asking me how my day was going but the way he phrased it was so cute that it made me smile even though it was short and simple. Those are special things. 
4. Friends. While it was yesterday's event, I can't help but loving when Lo, Erin, and I all are having the same kind of day at the same time and all decide to tell each other at the same time. That is a kind of connection people spend their lives looking for. I have found my soulmates in my best friends and that is really incredible. 
5. Rehearsal. The show is really coming together. We open in a week and a day and I actually feel like we will be ready for it. I enjoy going and relaxing and loving on my castmates.

While there are other things that are fun and exciting (y'all should really check out the iPhone game Triple Town)  these five really made my day survivable even after relaxing all week.

Oops

Guys. I am a really terrible blogger. I just go through these phases where it is a hassle or I am just not in the right mindset or I just don't have time. Well... I don't really feel like it now either but I am bored and stuff is happening.

So. I had a birthday... I like being 21. ERIN!!! Catch up to me and Lo so we can play like adults this summer!

a Mai Tai I ordered. legally. yeah!

a compilation of my birthday dinner and the boy who paid for it all

 

This weekend has had beautiful thunderstorms and I have played in them with friends!

When I came back to Evanston from Dallas we went to Dave & Busters for my first time and I hit jackpot on TWO games!

Ray and I did a puzzle. I forget how nice it is to sit down with no technology and just be with someone.

My easter basket had wine this year. JJ's had whiskey. We were both pleased.


So there are a bunch of pictures of my life. On top of that, I am applying to be both a tour guide and on DM exec right now so we will see what comes of that. And I think I caught y'all up on the world!

Back To Heavenston

Well... This long weekend has been lovely. I have gotten more sleep than I will probably get all quarter so that is an upside. Bonus, I got this dress yesterday... downside is mommy won't let me take it back to school because she thinks I will ruin it. So boo... But I also got a maxi dress and that is allowed so yay!

I packed today. i always seem to take back more than I bring home so I am taking back two bags instead of one... oops...kinda... I tried packing in a new style. Here is a video from the interwebs that demonstrates it. I'm not sure if it really worked or if the amount of clothes I was packing would've fit anyway. But I am sticking to it!

I painted my nails:

And here is a pic of my haircuts:

Looks like I'm ready to head home!!! Just got to make my bed...

Big D

I would be lying if I said that I wasn't bummed that my Disney World spring break plans had to be bailed on because of poor girl problems but the wonder that is home is SO good.

First off, I get my hair done tomorrow which is the best feeling after a Chicago winter. I know Elsa will be mad at me and yell about taking better care of it and trimming it more often but the truth is she loves my loyalty to her the same way I love that I barely have to say anything to her for her to get my hair right. It is the mutual understanding that my hair has to be one way and that is that.

Secondly, I will eventually see Lauren and Erin. While napping won out today... I will win tomorrow!!!

Thirdly, new bras. Bras are expensive. My parents consider bras a necessity. Therefore, I get to buy new ones with them so it is practically like getting bras for free!!! Also, I have actually been feeling some back pain from the lack of support my old ones have been giving me.

Fourthly, family. Mexican food is my family's way of telling me they love me. So with each bite of my Mariano's steak fajitas I could feel the love.

Lastly, crafts, Crafts with glitter. Crafts with sorority letters. Crafts.

Why does photo booth only print in reverse?!?!

this is for my birthday which is coming up. made on an old button from an old friend from our old high school drill team...

One heart. One love. One dream.

I have never been more overwhelmed in my life. There are too many people to thank for this experience. I am going to miss it so much. It has been so much of my last 4 months. Below is a picture of Ned and I after the final total was revealed and we had raised over $1.1 million for those kids. They have such a spark that I wish I saw in more people nowadays. I love what Dance Marathon stands for and what it does for this university. Thank you Exec, DM and Ned for being with me for 30+ hours, I love y'all!

IT. IS. HERE.

Ladies and Gentlemen! (Mostly ladies who read this right?) Dance Marathon starts at 6:00PM TOMORROW!!!! From 6PM until 1AM on Sunday.... I WILL BE DANCING! That's about all I have....

Here We Go

Dance Marathon is 9 days away! It is quickly approaching and as I am supposed to be catching up on sleep, I am actually exhausting myself doing stuff for DM. Ned and I have been spending hours filming the videos that will play to motivate the dancers. This past Saturday we spent from 9am-7pm filming three different videos and at the end of it all, I passed out for the next 16 hours. We filmed this morning again but it was pretty awesome. One of the concepts for our videos included a mob of people walking down Sheridan road singing MmmBop. And it happened and it was cool! I will definitely work on posting the links to those videos once they go up!

Here was our first one that we used for Dancer Kickoff!

February

I have been on a blog hiatus for a while. I just couldn't find the motivation to write for a while when in my spare time all I wanted to do was sleep. Well... I'm back.

My show is done y'all! Pink Milk was beautiful and it all came together in the end and was a really important event on campus. We even had a beautiful poster!

Pretty right? I also finally had time to wake up and do my make up today and shave my legs and do those sticky on nail things... pretty much the greatest discovery ever. They are so easy to use and the lack of dry time means that I can have pretty nails all the time!!!!

I chose this heart pattern for Valentine's day which I will actually be spending with someone for the first time I think ever... Do I know what I'm getting the boyfriend? Nope. Probably craft something in reality because I don't have the time to order anything. Do y'all have any ideas?

Apology

I don't know how to apologize. I don't know how to permanently fix things. I can bury them and pray that it doesn't claw its way up to the surface, but I don't know how to fix them. They will always come around and bite me in the butt. I can't do it. I can't fix everything and sometimes I need help. I don't like asking for help, especially when it is in relation to them. If I have a problem with someone I don't want to be the one to tell them, but I have to. I have to be able to explain why I am unhappy and then make it better. I don't like to tell people something that bothers me because I don't want people to change. I don't want to be the driving force behind someone feeling like they aren't good enough.

Rant.

What I've Gotten Into

This week has been a test of my desire to work on the things I've gotten myself involved in. My show, DM, school, and even my relationship have caused me extra bits of stress this week and have asked (extremely loudly) whether or not I want to do the work it takes to keep up my commitments.

Each have been answered with a resounding yes.

Let us begin with my show. My director is artistically brilliant. He has these big, beautiful ideas that do not fit within a college budget. I hate telling him no. But tonight I finally had to. But we worked, we compromised and eventually we found a solution that both of us would be happy with!

DM is requiring filming at 9 am tomorrow morning. I am NOT a morning person. People die when in my path in the morning. The worse part is that tomorrow is expected to have a wind chill in the negatives be snowing almost all day. Filming will take place outside. This may have been a deal breaker if my co-emcee Ned had not been so incredible. He came up with an absolutely brilliant concept for the video and it makes me want to wake up and film this thing.

School is requiring much more outside work than I thought I signed up for. Yet, my acting project went off without a hitch, my teacher loved my monologue, my narrative class is opening me up to new ways to attack theatre, my painting class gives me four hours of mindless creativity and my poetry class is reminding me why I used to write in the first place.

Relationship. This is my first one in which I have stuck around long enough to experience the out-of-honeymoon phase. I have never had this. So, it was a huge shock for me when, after 7 months, we began to slip out of it. To someone who has never experienced this, I was scared and shocked and uncomfortable. I talked to boyfriend about it and he explained that he didn't love me any less, but rather he is now comfortable with how much he loves me. This was probably the greatest realization of my week. I don't have to be constantly holding his hand or cuddling up in his lap to be happy. The shock wasn't only because I was out of the honeymoon phase but because I was still happy. Plus... we still do crazy little things that remind me of the beginning. We didn't lose the spontaneity and love, we just have to choose moments to be spontaneous and go above and beyond to show love.

My week was big. Maybe the longest week I've had so far this school year. But it was a good one. I have the best of friends to get me through it and I am happy. Stressed? Yes, but happy.

Theta

I have to admit that I am not the best sorority member in the world. I was unable to make a single chapter in the fall due to rehearsals. But I am reminded at least once a year how much I love these girls. Theta is something that I am extremely proud to be a part of even when I sometimes joke that I am way above the whole sisterhood thing. (I am no where near above it) I find that during rush, I fall in love all over again. Theta is full of the most unique and amazing girls I have ever met in my life. Something that has helped and hurt Theta over the years is that we rush individuals and not friend groups. We are very honest about who would be good in our house and won't rush one girl just to get another. While this sometimes results in the loss of some incredible people, it alos leads to a much more bonded pledge class because we are forced to meet so many new people, so many incredible people. Rush brings us all together once again to try and find the next generation of awesome. I am forced to work with girls who I haven't seen in a while and always come out with the closest of friends. Theta doesn't judge. I might not have been around for an entire quarter but I was still loved and appreciated and some beautiful soul would laugh at my pathetically tired jokes. And now it is over and I of course am saying that I will be around more and love these girls more. I said this last year but something is different. Next year I will be a senior. Next year I will be going through this for the last time and I want to stand there crying at the speeches with old friends, not just new ones. So here it goes, 2012. Love at first kite.

making the babies' kites! 

our beautiful baby kites! 

My babies are going to be mommas! I love them so much! 

Rush

This post's title is the reason for my lack of other posts... I will be back as soon as I can.

Sorority Recruitment.

I LOVE KAPPA ALPHA THETA FRATERNITY FOR WOMEN!